Who Would Dare Plagiarise The Mighty Orlok?

[Count Orlok]

Who would dare to mock the great Count Orlok,
Mighty vampire bat and ace *********?
No one at all, I tell you, my old dear -
Against that I'd be a strong advisor.

But if anyone e'er dared to steal my poems
I'd surely rip their ****ing throat apart;
They'd be opening a veritable can of worms -
And who cares if it were a guy or a tart?

So beware of stealing aught from this wicket bat
Who flutters above your house by night;
I'll surely find out just where you're at
And then may Satan pity you in your plight.

Anyone who steals my poems is condemned to Hell
And their death pains will be truly grotty;
Since, in spite of the really awful smell,
I'll stuff ***** ****** up their ***** *****.

Attachments:

[Edna Sweetlove]

I like this better than a dose of clap.

[Count Orlok]

I meant every word of it.